Three Aspects of Reality Nobody Can Avoid
and the tools to help you thrive...
If you have Netflix, you may have seen the documentary from Jonah Hill that also stars Phil Stutz. Phil is a true game-changer. I highly recommend you watch it. Ever since I watched that documentary, I have been listening, reading and constantly going back to Phil’s book “The Tools”. I have the audiobook, and a physical copy and have watched that documentary. The audiobook is great too because Phil and his co-author Barry Michels narrate it.
For someone to understand “The Tools” in the book that Phil provides, you need to first digest that there are three Aspects of Reality that nobody can avoid in life - Pain, Uncertainty and Constant Work.
Power, money, experiences, stature or material belongings…none of these will allow you to escape these realities.
Take some time to digest that again…it’s quite powerful. It was (and still is) for me!
Understanding, becoming comfortable with and embracing these realities is both humbling and freeing at the same time. Grounded in the sense that these experiences are completely normal and freeing is that you can now easily move past the uncomfortable feeling each brings and seek limitless opportunity. I am constantly going back to these three realities because it is easy to get caught up in the days/weeks/months of life. The constant reflection and perspective adjusting gives me relief as well as strengthen my resolve to continue “fighting the good fight”.
As a leader, these realities build your resilience and ability to persevere through challenging situations; you’ve upgraded your leadership toolkit. Great leaders know how to embrace these realities and then use the right tools regardless of the situation.
After you’re comfortable with the realities, the next stage is to look at the tools provided by Phil to deal with what life brings you. There are five tools:
The Reversal of Desire: Encourages embracing pain and discomfort as a means to propel oneself forward, aligning with the concept of moving towards growth rather than away from discomfort.
Active Love: Focuses on generating feelings of unconditional love towards others, even in the face of disagreement or conflict, promoting empathy and understanding.
Inner Authority: Deals with establishing trust in oneself and embracing one's inner shadow, fostering self-acceptance and confidence.
The Grateful Flow: Aims to cultivate a deep sense of gratitude for life's gifts, countering dissatisfaction and fostering a positive outlook.
Jeopardy: Focuses on willpower, urging the reader to confront mortality and the urgency of living, thus catalyzing action towards one's goals.
These tools require constant practice and use…and go easy on yourself, some of them may take longer to stick than others.
I highly recommend reading (or listening to) his book and unpacking these tools further!
Truly a game-changer.
Thanks for reading!
Adam